music i've enjoyed, as of late

there have been a few groups that i've liked lately, and i haven't posted music on my blog in quite a while!

i can't stop playing this song by The Tallest Man on Earth, "King of Spain". it's so fast and the guitar work is strummy and complicated, and his voice is grainy and Dylan-esque. i'm not a big Dylan fan or anything, but i'm impressed. check out his album: The Wild Hunt





another group, who has put their EP online for freeeez is Painted Palms. they have a really chill style. my favorite song is called "Water Hymn" but this one is pretty cool too: the title track "Canopy".





and the last group (that i've been hearing songs by them here and there all year) is Washed Out. check out this video:



i hope to see them when they come to Club Downunder in the spring!

grad photos with spence

michelle spencer is my roommate, and she just graduated this past saturday. she was kind enough to let me take some photos of her for a graduation present. these are the results!

michelle is such a jewel. i'm not sure i totally captured her bubbly personality...but she was a joy to work with. and above all, she is a huge blessing as a roommate. i cherish our friendship, and am so proud of her!

christmas photos with the Naizers

photo shoot with KD part 1

here are some of my favorite shots from a photo shoot that I had with Kathy yesterday! the one above is my favorite of all of them.

we were having the hardest time finding somewhere to shoot! we were by ourselves and we kept coming up to secluded areas where there were creepy looking fellows either lurking by the lake or coming out of the woods randomly. and then, kathy's car ran out of gas, haha. so it was a little rough getting started. but she was a great subject (as much as she'd like to refute it) and we had a blast!

sunburst

shy

b&w on the fence

on the dock

smile :)

playing in the leaves

kathy leaping!

canopy road

slide

slide again!

swing!

leaf

balance

profile of the lukewarm

this is a chapter i just finished reading in Francis Chan's Crazy Love. it was so convicting.

it was about what it looks like to be a lukewarm Christian. these are some that were specifically hard-hitting:

1) "lukewarm people give money to charities and to the church as long as it does not impinge on their standard of living." p.69
--"Jesus looked up and saw the rich putting their gifts into the offering box, and he saw a poor widow put in two small copper coins. And he said, "Truly, I tell you,this poor widow has put in more than all of them. For they all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on." Luke 21:1-4

2) "lukewarm people don't really want to be saved from their sin; they only want to be saved from the penalty of their sin. they don't genuinely hate sin and aren't truly sorry for it; they're merely sorry because God is going to punish them. lukewarm people don't really believe that the life Jesus offers is better than the old sinful one." p.70
--"I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." John 10:10b
--"What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it?" Romans 6:1-2
3) lukewarm people are moved by stories about people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act.
--"But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves." James 1:22
--"So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin." James 4:17

4) lukewarm people say they love Jesus, and He is, indeed, a part of their lives. but only a part. they give Him a section of their time, their money, their thoughts, but He isn't allowed to control their lives." p.72
--"As they were going along the road, someone said to him, 'I will follow you wherever you go.'" And Jesus said to him, 'Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head. To another he said, 'Follow me.' But he said, 'Lord, let me first go and bury my father.' And Jesus said to him, 'Leave the dead to bury their own dead. But as for you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God.' Yet another said, 'I will follow you, Lord, but let me first say farewell to those at my home.' Jesus said to him, 'No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.'" Luke 9:57-62

another thing he said really REALLY hit me in the gut:
"I think most American churchgoers are the soil that chokes the seed because of all the thorns. Thorns are anything that distracts us from God. When we want God and a bunch of other stuff, then that means we have thorns in our soil. A relationship with God simply cannot grow when money, sins, activities, favorite sports teams, addictions, or commitments are piled on top of it." p. 67

today has been a hard day where i just felt like that's exactly what i've been doing: piling things, activities, relationships, sins, etc etc on top of my soil, so that my relationship with God can't grow. i just keep remembering that saying "you are what you do". i can keep talking about the things that i want to do, but how do i really spend my time? it hit me hard. i need Jesus. i am failing at faith, letting the things of the world choke it out. Jesus forgive me. it is only by your drawing me unto yourself that i will be found faithful.

Jesus, come be the gardener of my heart. uproot the thorns of this world that are in my heart; thorns of sin that are deeply rooted. i long to be faithful, but i don't think i've counted the cost. i must be willing to give it all up, everything that tries to set itself higher than Christ.

from the mouth of gabriel

Sufjan Stevens has a new EP out, called All Delighted People. It is delightful. I think this is my favorite track, at least at the moment.

The song is in 4/4, but the way that this last part goes creates a syncopated feel, extending some parts of the phrase and creating emphasis on the "3&" beat. I love the fluttering flute and clarinet alternating, overlaid with the spacey electronic tones and echos. And his voice is doing something very Sigur Rós-esque, jumping from low notes to high falsettos (or maybe that's just as Sufjan as it is Sigur Rós, but whatever). This end part sends me soaring:

Now I know this is strange to hear from the mouth of God
It was something like a scene from mars
In a struggle between loves and lies
The angel kept his face covered for to keep his word
And while I spoke something left from my life
Forget about the past
Be at rest I'll make things right
And while I held you at best you nearly died
Forget about the past
And I'll try to make things right

the pieces of me

i just finished reading a book by a former Navigator, Connally Gilliam, called Revelations of a Single Woman. the third chapter, called "Our many selves", rings so true with me i just had to write something down.

she talks about having so many aspects of her life, including people she wants to be, that do not mesh. she felt pulled into the grunge of urban ministry. she also feels the pull of the deep-rooted desire to be a Southern Belle debutante. and she is also intrigued to be a crunchy granola, hiking, making-her-own-goat-cheese type. haha, oh how i identify!

my personalities/desires to be a certain type of person are very similar.

1) urban ministry. i think deep in the heart of me, i would like to be a female version of what Shane Claiborne appears to be: a crunchy granola guy who loves Jesus, lives with the urban poor, destroys barriers of racial inequality, makes his own clothing, lives in deep community, and challenges himself and others to embrace the gospel in such a radical way. however, the more i think about it, i am pretty dang selfish and like my comforts...i probably would never truly put myself in that position.

2) bad girl. i had grown up not really ever challenging the rules, always going to youth group, never drinking underage, etc. when i got to college, things changed a little bit--i found friends who liked to smoke and drink, who loved to rock out at concerts, and often challenged my views. it was easy for me to get sucked into their carefree lifestyle, feeling like a rockstar, staying out till 2am on a beer buzz, smoking cloves, and dancing the night away at jazz night.

3) crunchy granola/hippie. i think this is a modification of the female Shane Claiborne...just that maybe there is more focus on outdoorsy activities, learning how to grow my own food, being interested in politics and how decisions from the top affect those lowest on the totem pole, maybe crafts like knitting, playing the guitar and djembe, haha. :)


4) hipster. i fill my ears with the sounds of indie rock. tattoo'd and loving the cut-off shorts, i wish i had the athletic stamina to bike everywhere. i'm also the kind of person that gets wrapped up in trends, but idk if that's necessarily hipster. but i think there's one specific hipster thing i've done: i've been disappointed when a band that was unknown becomes more mainstream, and everyone starts listening to them. but i think there are things about a hipster that i don't really embrace, like liking things just because of the social aspect of it, and not necessarily liking things/doing things because that's what they like/like to do.

5) good christian girl. i often imagine a pretty, somewhat preppy, skirt-wearing (or at least well-dressed), quiet girl is this ideal type. and except for the christian part, i think at this point in my life i identify with this personality the least, but it is something in my heart-of-hearts i wish to be. this girl is feminine, attracting the opposite sex with her mystique and quiet heart...not to mention her beauty. being a Southern girl, i feel a pull to be more like a debutante than i truly am. and outward appearances aside, i think this type of person at least fills herself with the Word and seeks the Lord with all her heart, and i have been found wanting in those areas.

i think that what struck me about this chapter is that Gilliam was saying that it's ok to have this sort of identity crisis, as long as you seek The One that can bring all these identities together by seeking Him as our center.

Lord, i'm still trying to figure out who i want to be. i want to learn to serve you better. therefore i want to embrace the qualities of some of these characters that will glorify you.

another piece of me is the piece that wants to be married. i think this book really helped give a good perspective for remembering all the different things you can focus on while you're still single. i know there are things that i need to work out before i'm even ready to be married. Lord, i pray that you will just help me focus on what i need to do to deepen our relationship instead of worrying what to do to get a relationship with a man. amen.

a fun day at the beach!

This is from a beach getaway with my friend Kathy. We went to St. George's Island on the Sunday before Labor Day, and it was pretty overcast, but very beautiful! We got so sunburned, hahaha! We looked like friggin' lobsters afterward, but it was totally worth it.